So you are a single mom and intend to ease back into the dating scene? Dating as a single mom can be a daunting task, however it is not impossible. These 10 tips for dating as a single mom will help you to get things right:
Everyone around you may have an opinion about your social life and whether you date or not. In spite of the advice you are likely to hear a lot from left and right, remember that you are entitled to your life and you are the one who decides whether to date or not. If you feel ready to date, do not allow anyone to dampen your spirit, get into the dating field and do the necessary.
2. Expect some resistance
Your kids may not be very amused when you begin dating, in their minds they may perceive any potential dates as competitors for your time and attention. This is a natural response. Rather than engage in arguments and tantrums, sit down with them and acknowledge their feelings. At the same time make them understand that you love them but you also love to spend time with your friends just like they do.
3. Avoid getting intimate too soon
When you get back into the dating scene, you are likely to feel like a teenager with raging hormones, however you need to put on your brakes and practice some self control. In the heat of things, it is quite easy for passion to get confused with love and get carried away in a relationship that may not work for you. If your man is not willing to wait, it means he does not have the patience to wait for things to work out for you. A true gentleman waits and does not push too hard. He will respect your feelings and give you time to make up your mind. Ultimately, remember that you want him to respect you, so avoid rushing things.
4. Expand your social circle
In most instances, it is quite hard to meet new people when you are waiting for old friends, colleagues and church friends to introduce you to single people you know. Use all the available channels including technology and dating innovations in modern times to meet new friends.
5. Schedule your free time
When your kids are away in school or at your mom’s place, take the extra time to interact with your dates. Ensure you schedule time for your new mate before he comes into your life. Many moms are so committed to raising their children that they rarely get time to know and interact with potential dates. To begin with you can set aside 2-3 hours every week to see someone new, this includes visiting dating sites and meeting new people.
6. Ask for introductions
Many single moms are quite shy about telling people they are single and ready to mingle. Unless you let people know your status, you may never get a chance to meet other singles searching for their soul mates .Rather than make assumptions that friends or colleagues will set you up with potential dates, make specific requests with at least 3 qualities about the mate you are seeking in your potential date.
7. Keep your kids out of your social life
Keeping your kids out of the dating scene is among the top10 tips for dating as a single mom. It is common for most moms to have conversations revolving around your kids. In the dating scene, you need to save this for a later time. When you are dating, a man needs to see you in a sexual way. Putting pictures of your kids on your dating profile or talking too much about them during your date will turn off a potential date.
8. Be discreet
Romance and passion has a way of sweeping people off their feet. In such circumstances you may not realize that kissing and cuddling in public may not be very appropriate. If your kids start to make snide remarks about your romantic behavior, you need to start thinking about the behavior you are modeling for your kids. Try to behave the same way you would like your kids to behave when they grow up.
9. Avoid handing your parenting responsibilities to your boyfriend
Your kids are your responsibilities no matter what, so do not be tempted to hand over your parental duties to your new man. Though it may seem cool to have your man pick your kid from school, avoid this practice until both of you are committed to the relationship in the long haul. In addition, do not even think of having him discipline your children as the kids will resent both of you and hold grudges against him
10. Get your priorities right
Getting your priorities right is among the top 10 tips for dating as a single mom you have to keep in mind. If your child has an out-of-town game that offers you an opportunity to meet your boyfriend, think it through before rushing off to meet him. If your kid needs you at the game, find some other time to spend time with your man rather than miss out on your kid’s game.